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On relating our experience to others, we all tend to gloss over details or not own up to difficulties that were perhaps transient.
I told...
Women have to learn how to orgasm
In the film ‘Shirley Valentine’ (1989), Pauline Collins plays Shirley, a middle-aged housewife. Shirley comments: “I’m not particularly fond of it – sex.
I think...
Women have to learn how their sexual arousal works
Some women appear to be so sheltered from the world of adult eroticism that one wonders if they have ever experienced sexual urges of...
Understanding women’s sexual arousal
Sex is associated with reproduction and with pleasure. Male orgasm is usually co-incident with ejaculation which leads to reproduction but female orgasm is not...
Sexual arousal during intercourse
When I had sex for the first time, I was disappointed because I had hoped that sex would be spontaneously arousing enough for me...
Why sex is called ‘making love’
The heterosexual act of vaginal intercourse is designed foremost as an expression of love between a man and a woman.
After all, if sex was...
What if female sexuality truly equalled male sexuality?
Imagine the scenario: a man and a woman facing each other, naked, in a world where men and women have an identical sex drive.
So,...
Most women are not aiming for orgasm through genital stimulation
Some women refer to 'making love' because the term more accurately describes their motives in terms of loving emotions rather than as an explicit...
The ‘non-genital’ female orgasm
In response to my suggestion that it was ridiculous to suggest that a man can give a woman an orgasm, a man wrote:
"My wife...
Positions and techniques for sexual intercourse
Shere Hite explained in the 1970s how the women in her surveys reached orgasm during sex. She compared women’s success with orgasm during masturbation...
Women’s sexual arousal tends to be assumed or overlooked
Much of what is known about female orgasm comes from women's experience of masturbation. Shere Hite’s work focused on female masturbation and the clitoris.
As...
Reaching orgasm
Rose was a pretty woman even in her late forties. Despite being a mother and housewife she always achieved a classy presentation. Rose told me:
“Although...
Making the most of sex play
Overall my partner and I have been lucky to have enjoyed exploring eroticism and sex play together. Sure we have had our ups and...
Some women do explore sexual pleasure
Slowly attitudes to sexual pleasure are changing and more couples are approaching their sex life with a willingness to try activities other than vaginal...
How to pleasure a man
Tracy Cox (author of ‘Hot Sex’ 1998) tells the story of a woman who welcomes her partner home wearing a sexy nightdress, with champagne...
Holding men responsible for women’s sexual arousal
Men are often blamed, unfairly, for the difficulties that women have with orgasm during sex. For example, it is suggested that, by coming too...
Men’s sexual arousal is usually easy
Young men wake up each morning with an erection and have spontaneous erections throughout the day as sex-related thoughts occur to them or simply...
Taking the ego out of sex advice
Why do adults so often assume that they know everything about sex when most people have never even read a sex manual?
Everyone is entitled...
Talking to women about female orgasm
Since the experts I talked to had no rational explanations, I decided to do my own research by talking to women I met in...
The truth about female sexuality
Sex is a difficult subject to analyse because it relies on our emotions rather than our powers of logical reasoning. How many women have...
Sex experts deal with sexual dysfunction
In the film ‘Doc Hollywood’ (1991) Bridget Fonda asks Michael J Fox whether doctors know more about sex than normal people.
This is a natural...
The sexual politics of female sexual desire
Although the modern day hype about female sexuality was in part sparked off by the work of Alfred Kinsey, the facts he reported have...
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